couples therapy
The Tango
You and your partner have grown apart. It doesn't feel like the type of relationship you envisioned from the start.
Connection and intimacy used to feel easy & real.
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Now, it's difficult to remember the last times you genuinely felt confident about the emotional space between you.
Most relational arguments are frequently caused by a failure to connect emotionally.
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Your arguments have become too hurtful and too often.
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You've built a life together, and you need to get back to the heart of it. ARE you there for each other?
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ARE you emotionally Accessible?
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ARE you emotionally Responsive?
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ARE you emotionally Engaged?
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If either you or your partner would answer "No" to any of these questions, then we can understand why you may be ready to invest in your relationship.
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If you're married, then your relationship may have changed over time, but your marriage vows did not and they still echo in the background.
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You remember how enchanting that "first dance" felt once upon a time. Now, your relationship moves & grooves to a different tune.
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Even If you're not married, then your relationship still may have changed over time. The argumentative and disconnected Relational Tango doesn't feel right.
You trigger each other, and this dance is exhausting.
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You want to connect and feel securely attached with your partner. Unhealthy relationship patterns do not just happen over night, and they may not change over night either. The consequences of inaction and maintenance of the status quo are huge.
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You and your partner can, hopefully, at least agree that whatever plan you may have had to sort things out for your relationship wasn't really working, and it seems like you need a new plan.
Couples in relationship may have multiple and diverse reasons for starting couples therapy.
Whatever your reasons, they're personal.
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Attachment Theory guides Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) interventions while getting to the emotional heart of safety, trust, and vulnerability in order to promote understanding, increase stability, and build more secure relationships. Read more about EFT here.
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"What counts in making a happy (couple) is not so much how compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility."
- George Levinger
what to expect:
FIRST: Free 15 Minute Phone Consultation. This is the first opportunity for you (including your partner) and the therapist to ask each other questions. We discuss reasons why you're getting started in therapy, your needs and your therapeutic goals, and schedule availability. Mostly, we want to figure out if you and the therapist could be a good fit to work together. If so, then we schedule an intake appointment and you receive a Welcome Email to the Client Portal, where you can complete the required consent forms and book future appointments online.
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SECOND: The Initial Intake Appointment. This is the next best opportunity for you to share as much about you and your life story as you can in order to help the therapist better understand you and what you need moving forward. Assessment & Evaluation of your relationship will guide discussion that is also focused on recent and remote history of many parts of you and your life like family, education, employment, self-care, and social relationships. We discuss a lot in this first appointment while we also make sure that the pace of our process helps you feel seen, heard, and understood. Finally, we identify specific therapeutic goals, discuss your treatment options, and create your personalized plan for therapy.
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THIRD: First Follow Up Appointment. Assessment & Evaluation, Treatment Planning, and Discharge Planning will continue to show up as frequent topics of discussion throughout the course of treatment - they're not just discussed once in the first session and then never again mentioned. Now that you have had a chance to create a personalized plan for your therapy, we start working it into action. Mostly, we keep building rapport because the therapeutic relationship drives the work.
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GOING FORWARD: Follow Up Appointments. Therapeutic process moves at your pace. Safely guiding clients through their own personalized treatment plan tops the agenda for each and every therapy session. Feedback Loops will help us monitor and modify how we work with each other in order to ensure that you get the return on your investment in therapy that you need because that is what matters to us most. Eventually, therapy will end and you (and your partner) will continue to build a life worth living.​